Living in a New City

It’s always hard to write vulnerable posts about things that are on my mind and weighing me down. I try to keep this a positive place most of the time so I’m not complaining right and left (everyone’s got their own problems), but sometimes I like to get something off my chest and hopefully get some responses from others who may have gone through/are going through similar things.

If you’ve been reading, you know I moved to Palo Alto about a month ago after graduating from UCSB and finishing up a couple summer classes in Santa Barbara. I had this idea in my mind that after college, I would have this super fun social life where people would be more mature and looking to connect over more than who could drink the most from a beer bong. My sister lives in San Francisco, and there is always something to do and people to meet. She has just as much fun now as she did in college. I knew that living in Palo Alto and not the city would be mellower, but I have been struggling with making new friends. I am a very friendly person, and I am trying to put myself out their in different ways, but man is it harder than I thought it would be.

In college, you are inevitably surrounded by people your age all the time, all looking to meet people and have fun. It’s not the same being out in the real world. I have realized that I am going to have to make even more of an effort to make new friends out here by being really open to anyone and everything. At the gym, at a local coffee shop, at work, etc – these are places that I am going to try even harder to connect with people. When I went to a coffee shop to do homework while in college, I had a ton of friends already and didn’t care who was sitting at the table next to me. I didn’t need to expand my social circle – not saying I was rude to people, but I wasn’t actively trying to make friends everywhere I went. This may sound like I’m thinking desperately (it’s not like I just want to make friends with random people who I have nothing in common with), I just want to make even more of an effort and be conscious of it.

This has been on my mind for the past month since I’ve moved out here as I’m slowly meeting new people and feeling a little discouraged that within a couple weeks I didn’t have a million friends to hang out with, which is what I’ve been used to my entire life! It’s definitely a change, but staying in contact with my high school and college friends via text/call/facebook is helping a lot because I truly do have a ton of amazing friends I just need some more friends in my own city to share new experiences with. I think a big part of this is I’m at that age where I want to meet boys, or rather “the boy”, and I may be feeling a little lonely in that department. I also want to note two of my best best friends Alexis and Jessica live near me now which I love and am so glad I get to see them more, but they are pretty much the only friends I have in this city so far (aside from a few others I’ve met).

Has anyone else had experiences moving to a new city where you only knew a couple people? How did you make friends and meet people? Any advice would be much appreciated! Sorry for this kind of emotional post, but I sometimes need to vent and hope others out there can relate.

I’ll end this post on some things that have made me happy today:

My mama came out and we had lunch together. She always makes me feel better.

I got in a good workout at the gym (30 minutes on the elliptical, 20 on the treadmill, intervals on both).

I made this delicious salad: spinach, baked sweet potato, and an egg.